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State Law

• All lollipops are banned.
• A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town."
• It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag.
• People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.
• All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.
• It is illegal to pretend that one's parents are rich.
• You are not allowed to breastfeed in public. (Repealed)
• One may not spit on a bus.
• When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed.
• You cannot buy meat of any kind on Sunday.
• It is illegal to attach a vending machine to a utility pole without prior consent from the utility company. Furthermore, if permission is granted, the vending machine may not be less than twelve feet from the ground.
• No person may walk about in public if he or she has the common cold.
• Destroying a beer cask or bottle of another is illegal.
• It is illegal to entice girls away from the Maple Lane School for girls.
• X-rays may not be used to fit shoes.

Local Law

Auburn

• Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status, may face up to five years in jail.

Bremerton

• You may not shuck peanuts on the street.

Everett

• It is illegal to display a hypnotized or allegedly hypnotized person in a store window.

Lynden

• Dancing and drinking may not occur at the same establishment.

Seattle

• You may not carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length.
• One may not spit on a bus.
• Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term.
• No one may set fire to another person's property without prior permission.
• It is illegal to carry a fishbowl or aquarium onto a bus because the sound of the water sloshing may disturb other passengers.

Spokane

• TV's may not be bought on Sundays.

Spokane County

• Strippers may not come closer than four feet to any customer.

Waldron Island

• No structure shall contain more than two toilets that use potable water for flushing. -San Juan County Ordinance NO. 7 -1995 (Passed June 7,1995)

Wilbur

• You may not ride an ugly horse.